The past night I stayed awake passed bedtime, swarmed with the idea about my interview, facebook, research, CFA exams.
I tossed for hours and by the time I slept, I was dreaming about the interview, dreaming that the interview is today, and anxiety hit me like the day before my big exam, and if there’s anything you should know about me, I have test anxiety.
I feel greatly confident and at the same time nervous that I’m not prepared enough or the words won’t flow right when I answer the questions.
This post isn’t about what could go wrong, but what could go right; in having the right thinking.
I read this comic over some buzzfeed article and this comic has stuck with me over and over again.
Often times, I would catch myself saying things like:
“Sorry I talk too much”
“Sorry you have to bear with these emotions I’m feeling”
“Sorry you have to see this mess”
“Sorry that you are dealing with who I am”
What the heck do I have to be sorry about?!
artwork by Yao Xiao
1. Instead of saying sorry, say thank you.
Growing up, my view of humbleness was to apologize. To be the one to give in, even if it’s not your fault. To resolve conflict.
Humbleness is one thing, but stooping yourself to a level that seems more demeaning to your self-worth than strengthening in will in the long-run push you into low self-esteem.
Instead of saying “Sorry you are seeing this mess”
Say “Thank you for being tolerable with my mess”
The recipient would go from feeling embarrassed and reassuring you it’s okay, to laughing it off and saying that’s okay.
2. The world is not out to get you.
Maybe because I’m Asian, and feel a little out of place, but yesterday at Starbucks while I was waiting in line, the server looked at me and walked pass me, to proceed chatting with her friends (they were sitting on the floor c’mon), while there was a vacant counter.
Or maybe, that counter was broken.
Yesterday, I sent an email out to a person, hoping they would respond, and they did not get back to me for more than 24 hours and I was worried that I was on their bad side.
Or maybe, they didn’t have the information ready to be sent out.
Even if the possibility could be one or the other, who cares? If you failed 3 times launching a rocket and people say you should stop trying because you’re running everyone’s fund out doesn’t mean you should stop trying. It doesn’t mean God is closing doors on you. It may sometimes be, but until you keep knocking, barging, and pushing every possible button there is, there is always an opportunity.
Confidence is the internal strength of your mind. I learn that walking into any opportunity, you have nothing to lose, but everything to gain…
….like a call option.
Think of it from the payoff point of view. Until you exercise it, the most you lose is the time and money you spent (the premium cost) on opportunity after opportunity, but if those success will reap rewards more than the premium, why worry?
Always see each failure as your shot in doing better.